Chapter 37
***
The woman stared out of the window for a long time, as if mesmerized. Occasionally, she bowed her head deeply like a guilty person and muttered something, but then she closed her eyes and lost consciousness, unable to overcome the drug.
"Hm, looks like her body has always been weak."
Ben examined Aubrey thoughtfully. He tried to convince Khaled that if she got some medicine and slept well for a few days, her condition would improve. Khaled stood impassively, staring down at Ben, an act that meant nothing to him, and Ben knew it, but the man in front of him was no longer his seventeen-year-old illegitimate son.
"I see."
Khaled stroked his chin and squinted at the bed where Aubrey lay. The woman's face, breathing rapidly, certainly looked better than it had yesterday, and even better than it had a few days ago.
"Didn't I tell you, I was pinching my thighs to keep from seeing you?”
There was a strange power in the woman's emotionless voice. It seemed to hang over him like a curse. Khaled ran a hand through his hair, shaking off his thoughts.
"Let's go."
The monotonous words made Lehman breathe a sigh of relief. It was nearly noon already. Even if he left now, he would still be late for his meeting with Angela Day. Lehman bolted out of the doorway.
"Stay with her until the Countess arrives."
Khaled left the room, leaving Ben behind. As he crossed the white hallway to the blue drawing room, he paused. A series of images flashed before his eyes: the wall the woman had clung to, the way she had wobbled and eventually crumbled. Khaled clasped his hands for a moment, grasping at nothing.
The woman's body was small. But it was also solid. Just enough that he could crush it with his strength. It had been that way then. The young slave hidden in the sack was small and frail, barely big enough for the skinny boy to hold in his arms.
"Boss!"
Lehman's shout snapped Khaled out of his thoughts.
"Just in case."
When he reached the ground floor, Annie came up to him with a cup of water on a tray, perhaps it was for Aubrey.
"Did you see that gash on her back?"
"What kind of wound?"
"It...... looks like this."
Annie drew a circle with her thumb and forefinger, then drew a complicated pattern inside. It was indecipherable.
"It's the exact shape, like it was stamped. It looks like an old scar, and you didn't recognize it?"
A scar on the woman's back. No, a scar on the body of a slave who had escaped from the island, the math was not difficult.
"Did you tell anyone?"
Khaled asked, and Annie wrinkled her nose. She meant who he thinks he’s talking to.
"Yes. Leave it at that."
Khaled left the townhouse, leaving Annie nodding stiffly behind him. The ready carriage drove off without further delay. Lehman, already wiping the sweat from his brow with the back of his hand, mentioned the impending meeting again.
"And, Boss. I have a favor to ask."
His voice was uncharacteristically firm, and Khaled turned to look at him. Undaunted by the icy stare, Lehman spat out what he had to say.
“Don’t pay too much attention to that young lady."
Lehman was loyal. At the same time, he knew Khaled Karnus better than anyone else in the world. He knew who was currently occupying the boss's head.
"I understand that you have a soft spot for her, sir. But you shouldn't have to interrupt your work to care about her like this."
"I was going to do it even if you hadn't told me."
"This time, I mean it, I'm begging you."
Lehman sounded desperate. Khaled gave him a reassuring smile, but it was short-lived. He knew he was crossing a line. That the reason he was so nervous whenever she showed up wasn't simply because he was seeing his old self. But what was it, if not that, what was this feeling?
Last night. He'd sat for a long time, sitting by Aubrey's side as she slept. He looked down at her face, which looked so peaceful, and wondered what the hell was the sum total of emotions that blossomed every time he looked at it. The color slowly returned to her face, the light freckles, the full lips. Again and again, Khaled's eyes scanned the face of the woman who had gotten on his nerves, even when he tried to ignore it, it would jump out at him.
But no matter how much he looked into her face, he couldn't tell. As time passed, only one thing became clearer. Once her breathing became ragged, his eyes would strain. She was like that, so easily swaying his mood. With her posture, with her eyes, with her voice. He hated it. It was annoying. He thought, "It's an eyesore, get rid of it, and be done with it.”
He told her to go away, and she said she would. She was a good talker. It was Khaled Karnus, himself, who had taken her back and imprisoned her. Suddenly, he was afraid for her as she lay there, still and asleep. He'd never been so reckless in his life, and he'd learned early on that he'd have to do whatever it took to succeed, and that the weak would be eaten. If he wanted to climb on the backs of the despised, he'd have to find their weaknesses and twist them.
He already knew all about her weaknesses, and he was doing one strange thing after another. Instead of grabbing and twisting them as usual, he made up flimsy excuses to meet her and told her things she didn't ask for. He had never seen anything so messy. Shameful. What the hell.
"Don't worry."
"...."
"I’ll never see her again."
The uncharacteristic calmness in his tone made Lehman relax. Khaled meant it. He was going to keep her away. Shaking his head slightly, he took the papers that had been clutched in Lehman's hand the entire time and began flipping through them.
"Stop looking at me. I'm doing what you want me to do."
He didn’t know what he felt for that woman. He didn't need to know. They didn't need to be defined; they just needed to be squashed. To be buried in the ground. To disappear.
***
Not long after Khaled left, the sound of sobs echoed through the townhouse. Barbara dabbed at her red eyes with a clean handkerchief and followed Annie's lead to the second floor. Aubrey had changed into her own dress, which was now dry, and was checking the necklace in her pocket when the door burst open.
"Aubrey!"
Barbara let out a sound that bordered on a scream and began to sob as she stumbled over to Aubrey. She was followed by Jeffrik, whose face was contorted into an unusual hard expression. Aubrey hugged Barbara and gave her a tearful greeting.
"Let me see. I heard you fell."
Barbara's hand was as warm and soft as ever, and as she cupped Aubrey's face, she wiped the tears from her eyes.
"Count Lavonne told me everything. How could you think such a thing, how could you think of leaving the house for that?"
Barbara sobbed again and hugged Aubrey.
"There's been a reason you've been so upset these past few days, and I know nothing about it and....... It's all my fault, I'm the one who put you through all this."
"No, Auntie. I'm sorry."
"I don't think I would have done this if I knew how uncomfortable you were."
In the midst of their tearful reunion, Jeffrik put his hand on Barbara's shoulder as if he couldn't take it anymore.
"Let's go. There are a lot of eyes watching."
Barbara quickly stopped sobbing. The way she dotted her tears with her handkerchief was elegant. It was the way a noblewoman cried. Aubrey stared at her, then took Barbara's outstretched hand.
Back at the mansion, Aubrey had to deal with the stares for a while. Trin and the maids, with whom she had only spoken a few times before, had come to her, asking questions and examining her condition.
"They say you've gone mad."
Boris said bluntly. Aubrey scratched her head and paced behind him.
"You're very upset with me, aren't you?"
She asked, and Boris turned around with a start. His wrinkled eyes were already filled with tears.
"Of course I'm upset, how could you say, 'Thank you for all the years, for all the happiness, for all the memories I'll never get again'?"
Memorizing the words of the long letter, Boris recited them line by line, then turned around and swallowed back tears.
"I'm sorry, I was so out of it."
He wiped the tears away with his large hands and looked back at Aubrey with a determined face.
"Are you sure you're not going to do that again?"
"What?"
"If you ever do anything that makes you feel as bad as you did this time, you must tell me. I'll help you somehow, but you must tell me, and never, never, never run away. Do you understand?"
His voice sounded angry and scolding, and there were tears again in the corners of his eyes. Aubrey smiled and nodded stubbornly.
"Okay. I won't run away, ever."
"You promise?"
"Yes."
She meant it.
She ran away to live, and she would survive.
***
"Then I'll go first, aunt. Master Nicholas is here."
"Yes, go."
Leaving Barbara smiling at her, Aubrey went out into the garden. Beneath a densely leafy geranium tree, two people stood close together, engaged in a private conversation.
"Master?"
Aubrey called out, and Nicholas, who had his back to her, turned around, startled. Then he smiled his polite, sunny smile, and Aubrey approached him with a benign smile in return.
"What were you doing?"
"Oh, just. Small talk."
Nicholas scratched the back of his neck, sounding as if it was no big deal. He glanced at Boris and squinted. Boris smirked and stepped aside. Soon, a tea table was set for the two of them, and Nicholas told her all about things that were happening in his life.
However, the battle for partners at a certain ball and the invisible war of nerves among the ladies no longer held Aubrey's interest. Aubrey nodded with a smile similar to the one she'd worn earlier. Of course, she chimed in from time to time.
"So, where have you been?"
Nicholas asked, having finished his uninteresting story, and Aubrey remembered in hindsight that she had kept him waiting so she could talk to Barbara.
"I'm sorry, I had a favor to ask my aunt."
"A favor? Like what?"
Nicholas asked, as if the favor was something he could do himself.
"I want to do some studying."
"Study?"
"Yes."
Nicholas cocked his head. Then, rolling his near-blue eyes back and forth, he asked her.
"What are you going to study?"
"I haven't decided yet, I just want to study for a while."
"Are you thinking of becoming a teacher?"
She hadn't thought of that, but it wouldn't be a bad idea. Aubrey nodded involuntarily. Earlier, she had gone to Barbara and told her she wanted to study. She also asked if she could help. It was the first thing Aubrey had found as a way to stay here and not run away. To study and get a job. She felt that if she learned a lot and knew a lot, others wouldn't look down on her.
"What do you want to study?”
Barbara had asked, but she couldn't answer. Aubrey stammered, but Barbara smiled gently and said, "Don't worry, you’ll figure it out.”
"A teacher."
Nicholas, interpreting her habitual nod as an affirmation, cocked his head and said.
***
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