Sorry 40

 Chapter 40

    ****

    The unexpected question froze her like a broken machine, and she shook her head belatedly in retort. 

    She didn't want to instill any negative thoughts in Kylan's mind.

    She didn’t remember exactly what it felt like to die, only the blur of the fall. So it was also true that it didn't hurt.

    Kylan met Euris's gaze and spoke low.

    "...... Why are you telling me this?"

    "Because I need to ask you a favor."

    "......what favor?"

    Euris bit her lip at the words, and as she swallowed, she could almost feel her parched throat. Now it was her turn to tell him what she was here for.

    "Please don't go to Lepallon."

    At the sound of the woman's voice, Kylan blinked once. But there was no movement. In fact, he looked calm.

    "Why?"

    "In your last life, Kylan, you told me. That if you hadn't gone to Lepallon the war wouldn't have happened."

    Kylan tilted his head back in understanding, his eyes closing softly.

    "You want to stop the war."

    "Yeah."

    Silence fell over her answer, and when Kylan opened his eyes again, they seemed to hold some kind of resentment.

    "Do you love him?"

    He asked. With a look of emotion that looked like it could burst at any moment.

    "...."

    Euris couldn't answer easily, not with that look on his face. She stared at him for a moment, then lowered her head ever so slightly, but she couldn't imagine if Kylan saw it.

    His question brought out her guilt. Did she love her husband?

    Is that why you've come to me now, to use me as a pawn to throw away?

    Expecting me to sacrifice myself for you and wish you both happiness?

    His unspoken words replayed over and over in her mind. Euris lowered her gaze.

    "I must go to Lepallon."

    At the sound of his voice, her eyes snapped back to Kylan in surprise.

    "......Why?"

    "If I don't go, are you sure there won't be a war?"

    "That…."

    "If it's me they're after, they'll try to find me somehow, and even if I run away, it's probably only a matter of time before they catch me, which might make it even more dangerous."

    "..."

    "Even if I did flee to a place where no one could find me, do you really think Lepallon would let Alton go? They might think that I, the last of the imperial bloodline, would be recognized and hidden by the Alton Empire."

    Euris couldn't refute a word of what he said. It all made sense, and a sense of despair swept over het.

    There really was no way to stop the war. No matter what she did, it would happen.

    "If I do as you say, and don't leave for the Lepallon Empire, isn't that an even more terrifying future? You haven't lived through it yet."

    "..."

    "I have to leave."

    He sat down on the couch, leaned forward, and half-covered his face with both hands as he spoke. A scraggly beard pushed out of the man's hands.

    "If I stay here, my mother and Eisen will be killed, and I will most likely be taken to Lepallon. Running away would be a futile endeavor, and going there is inevitable."

    Euris bowed her head deeply as she listened. Kylan was right. How short-sighted she'd been, she realized, even pitying herself.

    "Come with me instead."

    The words startled her, and she lifted her head to look at him. Her eyes were unmoved. She couldn't answer him. The air was so still that time seemed to stand still.

    "The fact that you have come to see me suggests to me that you are at least somewhat prepared to leave your husband, don't you think?"

    "..."

    Her breath caught in her throat at his sharpness.

    "If it's not that...... it’s disappointing."

    One corner of Kylan's mouth quirked up, as if to say, I knew from the start that you would ask such a selfish favor.

    She wasn't sure she was mistaken. His cold eyes were chilling, and she felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up.

    'Yes, the last time I saw you..... you looked like this.’

    The only thing that was different now was that Kylan wanted her.

    "You came to me first, and you shook me, and I was shaken."

    "..."

    "I know you have someone you love, and I know I'm being the villain to break their love, but me?"

     "......Kylan."

    "My heart can just be trampled on, and because I've already lived one life, my heart in this life can just be used to stop a war, and then thrown away? Isn't that what you've come to me    for?"

    He looked at Euris's dazed expression, and then swept his hand across his face.

    "I tried to think I was okay with being unhappy, as long as you were happy, but I guess not. Seeing you like this makes it clear: I'm selfish, and I want to be greedy, too."

     "...."

    "I missed you, Euris."

    "Kylan......."

    "I think I’ve been punished enough."

    Muttering something unintelligible, he tucked Euris's hair behind her ear. His hand felt ice-cold against her skin.

    "I need you to come with me, Euris. Stand beside me and tell me the future you saw. I know you didn't go to Lepallon in your last life......but I think it will help you in some way,    surely."

    He looked her in the eye at close range. Euris held her breath. No thoughts came to her, as if her mind had stopped working.

    The scenario of her following him to Lepallon had never crossed her mind.

    "Two weeks later. If your mind is clear, come here before then. If you don't, I'll assume it's your decision."

    "......If I don't come?"

    "Well....... I'll leave for Lepallon, and you'll have to stay here and wait anxiously to see if there's a war or not."

    He said in a cold voice. Euris shook her head, feeling stuck. There was a moment of silence. It was only then that Kylan muttered his next words.

    "I'm tired. I don't want to care if there's a war or not."

    Euris stared at him in disbelief. Kylan's face, cold and exhausted.

    The smell of his cologne mingled with the faint scent of cigarettes in the room and filled her nostrils.

    "What does that mean?"

    "I'm leaving everything in this country, my title, the people I love."

    His gaze remained fixed on hers as he spoke.

    "The new country I must go to, it will be a ruin. I don't know what will happen to me, and I'm afraid. I don't want to go."

    "..."

    "What the hell am I supposed to stop the war for?"

    The voice was vague. She was speechless. She could have cursed Alton, the man she’d lived with for so long, how he could be so broken, but it didn't fit the situation.

    The way Kylan looked, too lonely, too distant, explained it all. What had he done to deserve this, to have such a heavy burden on his shoulders?

    "So I need you to come with me. I want you to have a reason."

    Again, the image of Kylan from the other life flashed through her mind. Coming down the stairs, dressed in the uniform of the Lepallon army, cold, hollow, broken, and mechanical, as if all emotion had evaporated from him.

    Suddenly, she wondered if Kylan had returned to the past, too.

    It wasn't impossible, since both she and Chaint had returned in one lifetime, but if he had regressed, why was he hiding it?

    So many thoughts raced through her mind at once, and Euris was confused. She stared at him with a blank expression, not knowing what to say.

    Kylan's face remained serious, as if he meant every word.

    ****

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