My child 5

 Chapter 5. A suspicious Shaman's proposal 

    ***

    "In exchange for my help, you must pay a price."

    "I'd give anything to see my child again."

    "If someone who knows you have returned to the past appears, grant him one wish."

    "His wish?"

    I was about to ask for more information about "him," but the man spoke quickly.

    "I can't tell you about him, of course. You just have to decide when you want to go back in time."

    I wanted to go back in time right now.

    What if the shaman suddenly changes his mind and disappears?

    "Send me back in time right now. Huh?"

    "I will."

    The answer was too crisp.

    As if he firmly believed I would pay for what I said.

    That's why I had to ask him a question.

    "Wait a minute. You...... Do you really believe I'm going to pay for that?"

    "You're going to have no choice but to meet 'him', Lady Riley."

    His tone was full of conviction.

    I was silent for a moment, not sure what the man was up to, and then he spoke as if to tell me not to worry.

    "Don't worry, the meeting won't be a big deal."

    Having said that, the man went back to talking. As if he was trying to turn the conversation around.

    "There's not much you can do about going back in time, Lady Riley."

    "......Yes."

    "Just lie there, close your eyes, and count to one hundred in your mind, and when you open your eyes, you'll be back in the past."

    "Okay."

    I thought as I flopped down on the bed.

    'Maybe I was too swayed by the first suspicious person I saw? I didn't hear any spells that said I could go back in time........'

    But I was heartbroken enough to want to die.

    Even if this man had bad intentions, it wouldn't matter if I died as I was.

    I might even be happy to die in peace.

    Even if I decided to die because I couldn't overcome the suffering of life, I would have to endure pain that rivaled the suffering of life to get there.

    Even dying on your own is a painful experience...... That was my reality.

    Someone's fingertips touched my helpless hand.

    The silent hand belonged to the shaman.

    Startled for a moment by the sudden contact, I watched what he was about to do.

    The shaman grasped my hand firmly in his.

    The warmth of his hand against mine was somehow comforting.

    "There's something I'd like to say in closing."

    "What is it?"

    "Be happy, I want to see you do that."

    "Will we ever meet again?"

    "If the stars align, I don't see why not."

    The man continued in a whisper.

    "That's enough talking. Start the count."

    I began to count in my mind as he spoke.

    '1...30... 61.... 62... 66.'

    When I reached that point, I felt a mysterious force envelope my body. At the same time, my five senses faded.

    The sensation of my skin fell away.

    The wind rushing past my body was gone, and I couldn't smell anything.

    The last thing to disappear was the clock. An eerie silence engulfed me.

    I could no longer count. No, I couldn't.

    ‘When I open my eyes again, the world will be upside down.’

    I intuited.

    ***

    The man stared at Riley's face, her eyes closed as if she was asleep.

    An energy glow began to emanate from his hand that clasped Riley's.

    It started small, but soon grew in size until it engulfed his entire palm.

    The light soon enveloped Riley's body.

    The darkness around him was brightened by a large wave of light.

    The man's body shook as he stood there, embodying the spell.

    A stream of cold sweat flowed from his forehead as he exhausted his strength.

    A spell to send someone back in time.

    It was a life-or-death spell even for the so-called powerful sorcerer.

    He had performed a spell on Riley that would cost him his life.

    "Ha."

    The man removed his hood, revealing his hidden, off-white color.

    He had jet-black hair, eyes blacker than darkness, skin so white it was pale, crimson lips, and his long lashes fluttered whenever he blinked.

    He was a handsome man who exuded an unidentifiable sense of decadence.

    He stroked Riley's cold hand a couple of times as it basked in the light.

    "Riley."

    His voice was different than when he spoke to Riley. It was cleaner, clearer.

    He had used magic to change his voice, to fool Riley.

    "We'll meet again soon."

    A smile crossed his face at the near-promise.

    ***

    They had only crossed one ocean, and the winds of the Ramsey Empire were cold.

    Stepping onto the deck, Henderson pulled on his coat and let out a small gasp.

    His gaze never left the blue ocean horizon.

    The Lopez empire, only a day's sail away, seemed so far away today.

    Perhaps it was because he had risen too high to feel the cooler breeze.

    Riley. 

    She'd had a bad heart since she was a little girl, and she was very vulnerable to the cold. With the recent loss of Eddie, he was worried that she might collapse. He had heard that she had gotten cold several times, even on the day of Eddie's death........

    Henderson grew impatient.

    He regretted leaving her at the ducal residence.

    Even with the Emperor's orders, he should have stayed a few more days.

    Henderson clasped his hands together, tinged with self-pity and regret.

    He felt insignificant that he had failed to fulfill the Emperor's command, that his child had died and he had been sent to another country.

    It had been nearly eight years since he had become a duke, but he was no different now than he had been eight years ago.

    A pretentious duke, the emperor's dog......

    The words he used to describe himself were the same.

    For the past eight years, he felt like everything he’d done to be recognized was for naught.

    Henderson's eyes flashed through his work for the past eight years.

    The vassals who refused to recognize a duke who was born out of wedlock. The ducal decrees he'd carefully managed to appease them.

    An emperor who didn't approve of marrying his youngest princess, Riley.

    A duke who did everything the emperor asked him to do to gain his approval.

    When he asked him to become a messenger for the allied Ramsey Empire, he did, even when he told him to keep her distance from Riley.

    "One year. If Riley still loves the Duke after a year of distancing yourself from her...... then I will never bother you again. You can take that as a sign that I approve of you."

    The Emperor said he wanted to see if Henderson’s love for Riley hadn't changed.

    Just one year⋯⋯⋯⋯⋯ one year to distance himself from Riley and earn the Emperor's approval.

    If he did, the vassals would no longer look down on him, and he would be able to be Riley's companion.

    His decision was predicated on his confidence in Riley. That she wouldn't change her mind about him.

    So Henderson made a risky deal with the Emperor.

    But now that he had lost his child, he regretted his past choices for the first time.

    ‘What    have I... What have I done?’

    A year after his promise to the Emperor, the child's funeral did little to comfort the grieving Riley.

    He wanted to hold her as she called out Eddie's name, her eyes still watery with tears and her lips twisted into a smile.

    He wanted to hug her tightly and said, "Don't be sad. You have me, and I'm sure he's in a good place."

     He wanted to comfort her.

    Henderson thought about placing a hand on her shoulder, but the 'emperor's eye' that had been placed on him prevented him from doing so.

    Soon, he had a year to fulfill his promise to the Emperor. The high ground was at hand.

    He couldn't be swayed now and let it all go to waste; he had come too far for that.

    So in the end, he couldn't comfort her. The day he was recognized by the Emperor, he would tell her everything and ask for forgiveness. He would spend years, even decades, begging her for it.

    He would tell her that he was sorry for being so cold, that he never loved her like she deserved. He desperately hoped that only her love for him hadn't changed.

     "Master Henderson. It's windy. Please go inside."

    Henderson's head snapped back. There stood the Emperor's Eye.

    His name was Hoover Donovan, a man with auburn hair. A knight of the Emperor, he had been his aide for nearly a year.

    But his real job was to keep an eye on Henderson to make sure he didn't mistreat Riley.

    "Yes."

    Henderson moved his feet from where they had been dangling precariously over the deck.

    He wanted it all to be over. The year he'd promised the Emperor, the grief of losing his child, the way he was forced to be cold to Riley.

    "..."

    Before stepping into the hallway that led to his cabin, Henderson stared out over the open sea.

    He could just make out the faintest glimmer of land above the azure waters.

    It was the territory of Lopez's empire that he had been so eager to return to.

    A homeland where the work the Emperor had ordered him to do had been completed quickly, and he was returning home earlier than scheduled.

    He worried about the look on Riley's face when she saw him again.

    ***

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