Chapter 25
***
"Coffee, can I get you one?"
The Count's maid approached and filled their empty cups. Euris stared at the opaque glass filled with black liquid.
"Kylan's mother was a spy for Lepallon, and he was forced to return to his mother's empire.”
She was said to be a key figure in the Lepallon Empire. However, she was not well known, as she was often involved in military matters and operated in secrecy, using code names.
Only after hearing the story did Euris understand why Kylan had suddenly pushed her away in her last life, and why it had been so hard to hear from him.
‘Spy, Spy, what he had to deal with was probably too dangerous for me, and he thought pushing me away would keep me safe.’
She lifted her coffee cup and opened her lips. She could taste the bitter beans.
'Yes, I'm sure being with Kylan was dangerous, and he was doing it for me, putting aside his own desires to be with me.’
Euris gripped the handle of her glass tightly. It rattled in a familiar pattern. She lifted the cutlery to add two cubes of sugar, then put it down. The sweetness wasn't quite there.
‘My relationship with Kylan has become so twisted, so tangled like an unravelable thread, that I can't even say I'm sorry anymore.’
Still, she had to have the conversation. After all, she had chosen to come to pay her respects. She couldn't let him go without explaining anything.
The couple left the tea room. By now, Kylan's surroundings had quieted down. He turned to face her, his face as white as a sheet of paper.
"Euris.”
It was a face she hadn't seen in a long time. He had only a modicum of courtesy for his childhood friend who he greeted.
And to the man standing beside her. Now the wife of Chaint Eridov, Kylan stared at her, all emotions in check.
Kylan's eyebrows twitched slightly as Euris approached. But his eyes remained calm. He smiled mechanically, as if he didn't want to be emotionally agitated anymore.
"Kylan......."
"Thanks for coming. Thank you for visiting, Master Chaint."
"Of course I should have come."
Kylan smiled faintly at Chaint's reply, then shifted his gaze to Euris.
"Go to the tea room and get some rest. Oh, and Mother and Eisen are there, I'm sure they'll appreciate it when they know you're here."
He didn't sound like he wanted to talk at length.
"I just finished my coffee."
Euris replied briefly, stubbornly adding her regards.
"How are you?"
Kylan's eyes flickered slightly, and she sent a glance to her husband, who stood beside her, telling him to wait in the carriage. Chaint nodded and disappeared with a bow.
"We need to talk."
At the woman's words, Kylan gave a small sigh and gave the butler at his side a quick nod. He then led Euris to a private area.
There was a small room behind the area where mourners were received. It was where he had often hidden during his childhood games of tag.
"It's been a while."
"Yeah."
Kylan drummed his fingers nervously and took the first seat at the table set up in the room. Euris took a seat across from him, carefully. Sitting with his back to the window, Kylan's face looked even darker.
"Do you want me to get you something to drink?"
"No."
An awkward air roamed the space. He just stared blankly at somewhere on the table. Euris stared into his red eyes for a moment, then spoke.
"I saw the letters you sent, late."
"...."
"Things happened, I'm sorry for the late reply......."
"It's okay."
"What did you want to say to me?"
At that question, Kylan's gaze snapped to Euris, and she read in his eyes that it was all too late.
"It doesn't matter now."
"..."
"Seriously, I don't mean it in a bad way, you know that, and I'd only make you unhappy by being around you, or maybe even endanger your life, and I don't want that to happen."
He smiled sadly.
‘Smart Kylan.’
Euris pursed her blood-red lips.
'You already think I know everything and pushed you away, convinced that I'm not the kind of person who would push you away for no reason, just like you did in the past.......'
Kylan looked so forlorn.
'You must have been so lonely in your last life, all alone in another country after you pushed me away.’
"I understand why you pushed me away and why you resented me recently, Euris. You made the right choice."
"......Kylan."
"There was one thing I wanted to ask you."
He paused, then met her eyes again.
"How did you know?"
It was a question that left out all the words, but Euris seemed to know what he was asking and how she knew.
‘You're probably asking how I knew who you were and what your father had just told you.’
She had come with the intention of telling Kylan the whole story, that she had died in the future and returned to the past.
But she paused, unsure of how or where to begin to tell him this ridiculous story.
But before she could get the words out, Kylan interrupted her.
"......No, just don't answer that, Euris. I think it's better if I don’t know."
"Why?"
Euris asked, and he gave her a wistful look.
"Because we're already done."
"...."
"We will never share each other's time again, not as friends, not as lovers, not in any way, shape, or form, because you have a husband now, and I'm a pariah in this country."
"..."
"And I'm really fine now, I've gotten over the grief of my father's death, I've gotten over the loneliness of having to leave this place, and I'm ready to accept my fate, so don't worry too much."
As he spoke, it was as if he were talking about someone else's business. Euris paled and said nothing.
"No matter what you say, it won't change anything. I don't want to be shaken anymore, it's been quite a struggle to get my mind straight."
He smiled weakly.
‘Yeah, nothing changes.......’
Her heart for Kylan had been pieced together over the years, ever since he'd pushed her away in her last life.
Telling him she'd died in the future, as he'd said, wouldn’t change anything. It would only shake him further.
"I've had a crush on you, since who knows how many years ago."
"....!"
Ever since she'd returned to the past, she'd been vaguely aware of Kylan's demeanor, that his heart had been turned toward her as well.
Funny, she didn't realize it until after her feelings for Kylan had cooled. It was something she hadn't realized in her last life, overshadowed by her own feelings for him.
"I thought we were on the same page, but I guess you weren’t. It was my arrogance......."
"Kylan, I......."
She trailed off in a crawling voice, unsure of what she wanted to say.
He was right......... What's the point now?
It was probably selfish of her to even come here now.
"I'm leaving for Lepallon before winter," he said, "and we'll never meet again, not even by chance. It's strange to think of it that way."
Kylan reached out and touched Euris's hand, which rested helplessly on the table.
"Eat well, and be as happy as you can be, Euris. I'll always cheer you on. Just like I did when we were children......."
For some reason, the woman bowed her head, feeling like she was going to cry.
She couldn't tell him.
'It's not that you are presumptuous, we were of the same mind, I liked you in my last life, it’s just meaningless now........'
Her answer stuttered, hovering in her mouth and then disappearing like smoke.
***
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Write a comment
Eve (Wednesday, 13 December 2023 19:18)
Don't say it girl!!! Just let him leave, it's what's best for everyone... :(
Emmanuel801 (Thursday, 14 December 2023 00:08)
So sad!
Ezsah_23 (Friday, 15 December 2023 13:06)
*sighs*
thank you translator-sama❤..!!
Luliibunny (Friday, 23 February 2024 13:58)
"There could have been no two hearts so open, no tastes so similar, no feelings so in unison, no countenances so beloved. Now they were as strangers; nay, worse than strangers, for they could never become acquainted. It was a perpetual estrangement.”
-Jane Austen,Persuasion
Alexe (Thursday, 25 April 2024 07:20)
This is so heartbreaking. Kylan, I hope you will have your own happy ending �